Turning 28: Settling Into Myself (Finally)

So, I turn 28 next week, happy birthday to me! Honestly, I always thought I’d be a bit more freaked out by it. You know, the classic “I should have my life together by now” panic. But the weird thing is, I’m not. My life isn’t exactly what I pictured at this age (still no house, no dog, no job and no boyfriend), but I’m genuinely shocked by how much I’ve settled into myself over the last few years.

Having younger friends and housemates has made this even clearer. Our mindsets are worlds apart, on dating, on life, on what people think of us. I used to care so much about other people’s opinions. Honestly, it was exhausting. I let what men (well, boys, really) thought about me dictate how I saw myself. It probably made me a rubbish friend at times, and it definitely wasn’t great for my mental health.

My ADHD doesn't help in this regard; I’m super sensitive to everyone else’s feelings. I pick up on every little shift in mood, every offhand comment, and for years, it really affected me. Add in all the societal nonsense, unrealistic beauty standards, the pressure to have it all together, the highlight reels on social media, and it’s no wonder we’re all a bit frazzled. Things have improved since I was a teenager, but we’ve still got a long way to go.

But now? I just tell myself: “You are who you are. If they don’t like you, so be it.” As long as I’m trying to be a good person, putting myself in other people’s shoes, and remembering that 90% of the time, it’s not even about me, I’m doing alright. Everyone’s got their own stuff going on, focus on yours, be a good friend, and let the rest go.

Who cares if people judge you? Who cares if that girl gave you a funny look in the bar, or if that guy saw you trip over your own feet? Most of the time, you’ll never see them again. And let’s be honest, it was probably hilarious anyway.

If I could tell my younger self (or any teenager, really) one thing, it would be this: don’t take life so seriously. Have fun, be kind, and trust that things will work out in the end. We need to teach our kids and teens that it’s okay to just be themselves, to laugh at the awkward moments, and to know that being a good person matters way more than being perfect.

So here’s to 28: Messy, imperfect, and finally, a little bit comfortable in my own skin.